...We come back from shopping about three hours later and the wife goes to scan through Facebook and sees about fifteen messages from him, all containing variations of “are you there” in the general body of the message. This sets off the crazy person alarm bells. I mean Christ, I just talked to him for forty five minutes a few hours ago. What the hell is going on here? My wife immediately gets into full on private investigator mode. Now the both of us are even more concerned as to why this potential nut was so cryptic about getting our number. As it turns out, before calling us he had gone through our entire Facebook timeline which had to have been at least the last nine months of status updates. We found one spot where we may have left a comment to a friend about our new phone number. There’s no fucking way I’m letting this nut into my house now.
For the rest of the day, it seems like every other hour we’re getting another Facebook message from this guy. I politely send him a note saying that we’re not exactly the types that are on Facebook all the time so leaving multiple messages is probably not the best course of action. Fast forward to the next morning, where I am awakened by the phone ringing. The VA tended to call early so I think nothing of it. It’s Brian. Creepy goddamn Brian. We had a late night watching movies with our son so the time of the call to just sit and shoot the breeze was a little ill-timed on his part. I look at the clock and it is literally three minutes after nine. I ask him why he is calling so goddamn early and he seriously told me that it was after nine which was the time I said it was alright. Which got me to thinking did this nut seriously wait like he was at the starting line of a goddamn footrace until Mickey’s little hand was on the nine to dial my number again?
Now, if this creeped me out you can imagine how much this creeped my wife out. I try and tell her that I don’t know what the hell exactly happened with the guy in the years since I’d spoke with him regularly. I send him a Facebook message later in the day telling him that his coming over for dinner when he was in town was still cool. That may have been the last time I heard from his ass because as it turned out my wife is a great judge of character.
She quickly surmised that the guy probably wanted someone to go out and get loaded with while he was in town. Yeah, with a wife at home I’m going to go out and play wingman to some guy that’s divorced with two or fifteen kids depending on accounts. I quickly broke off all communication with the guy and my life has been relatively quiet ever since.